My life flashed before my eyes.....

Ok, it was the entire contents of my purse. Or what I could remember was in there. Because for the brief-but-seemed-like-an-eternity 4.2 minutes it was missing during the Black Friday madness at Walmart, I was 99.7% convinced that my purse had been stolen.

This was the evidence:
1. I knew I had walked in with it - why wouldn't I??
2. I knew I had felt the weight of it on my shoulder because, obviously, I knew I had walked in with it. Refer to evidence #1.
3. I still had the Walmart ad in my hand - another thing I knew I had walked in with.

I had 1 lousy DVD to buy and Lizzy and I were debating as to whether or not the registers in the electronics section were really open when it clicked. I. Had. NO. Purse. On. My. Shoulder. Ummm...... What the heck?!?! THIS can not be. I am so screwed. EVERYTHING IS IN THAT PURSE!!!!! Well, everything but my phone and keys. Phew. At least I'd get to keep that. Great. My crappy, old phone and keys to my ride. But EVERYTHING ELSE was in that purse. Credit cards {not that they'd get very far with those} checkbook {again, couldn't really do much damage there}, our brand-new camera w/ a new 8GB memory card, several lip glosses {do not mock - they were Clinique and about $12 a pop!}, Ethan's Transformer cars, cash and who knows what other crap... I mean, incredibly valuable goods.

I tried to remain calm. Tried to think rationally. I retraced my steps to the toy department and back by the DVDs and finally started toward the front door. Meanwhile, Lizzy was running to keep up with me and asking me what she could do. Finally I told her to tell the lady at the entrance that I may have had my purse stolen and to watch the door. Not that it would do any good. I mean, really, it was Black Friday - there were TONS of people in that stupid store and the thief was probably long gone.

But I had to check my car.... just in case. I was doubtful - I mean, look at the evidence I provided. But I checked just to be certain my Thanksgiving weekend had, in fact, been ruined and would be spent on the phone with credit card companies, the bank, etc, etc. I got to the car and was hyper-ventilating. I threw open the back door and saw nothing. My worst fears were confirmed.

But wait...

What was that black thing that I could not see because it was dark and hiding under other sales ads???

My purse!!!!

Oh my gosh. I'm pretty sure the heavens parted and angels sang.

Granted, it took me another 15-2o minutes to calm down and stop talking about it. But still! There it was. Safe in my car and now back on my shoulder, where it belonged. Huge, huge, HUGE sigh of relief. Life may now resume as normal. Walmart shoppers, you may continue your Black Friday scurrying.

"Never mind..."
{Threw that last line in for you, Dad!}